This is the story of what inspired me to want positive people in my life. Enjoy :)
=================================
A few months ago, when my life turned into chaos and I’d come home to my very roomy one bedroom apartment in one of the hip areas in Chicago, I looked sink and realizing how full it is, exclaim, “NOT THE DISHES!” at a month’s worth of dirty dishes. This describes how I feel with dead weight in my life.
When I was in college, during my freshman year in the dorms, someone pointed out to me how I was “friends with everyone”. I saw that as a good thing when I was younger, but I felt like something was missing. I had tons of friends and a very fruitful network, but felt very lonely…
Once I graduated college, since due to proximity issues, it was difficult to maintain friendships, I needed to start over. I was a new person after college and felt confident enough to go out into the world and meet people. Shortly after my return home, I ended up reconnecting with one of my friends from high school named Shawn. He introduced me to his friend group, and I later realized I was hanging out with a toxic group of people who had no motivation to do anything in life except watch TV, party, and not have a job. My relationship with that entire group is dissolved at this point. Shortly after I reconnected with Shawn and friends, I ended up reconnecting with another high school friend, Chris. Chris ended up introducing me to his friend group as well. Of course, these people would end up being toxic for the same reasons and then some; however, I decided not to purge everyone.
I recently had to move out of my one bedroom apartment and realized how much I’ve been hoarding only 2 years into my full adult life, such as papers, notes, clothes, etc. Something memorable one of my ex boyfriends told me was how my true friends will help me move when I need to. Two of my dearest friends, Kyle and Noah, who are now my roommates, were the only two people I decided to maintain relations with after the second group of friends I met after college disbanded. The pair of them and a pair of movers helped siphon through my 800 square feet of clutter, which was all mine, and get it onto a truck which needed to fit 3 people’s belongings… About ¾ of the truck was filled with MY stuff. Whoops! Thanks Noah for your parents helping me to erase or donate a large portion of junk I didn’t need. About a month into living with each other, this is the first time since living in the dorms in college where I can get closer to my roommates instead of having to worry to fight with them. That was nice!
With a more optimistic view towards people, I still wanted a select person to form a spiritual bond with. Not even a romantic relationship, especially because I am still recovering from a somewhat recent breakup. With all of the “best friend” figures I’ve had in my life, I’ve always felt like there’s been a barrier separating me from the relationship I want with the other person. One adventure on the Mystery Machine later, an old green Pace Bus remodeled and painted from his family to represent a parody of the Scooby Doo version as the “Mystery Machine Party Bus”, ended up introducing me to his roommate, Trevor. Both of these two lovely people helped me with assembling my new apartment, which I dearly appreciate. After hanging out with Trevor some more, I feel like I’ve found someone to help me maintain my positivity garden, which is an outlet to spread joy and good vibes to all. Not only that, but this kind of connection with someone is depression’s antidote. Life’s too short to waste your time with toxic people. Hold onto those who want to create and foster love with you. Who do you want in your life?
No comments:
Post a Comment